School is a place for us to study, make friends, and enjoy. We, as students, spent most of the time in school. So, we disagree that the school should become a site of discipline. Firstly, though it helps to control pupils that are mischievous, they should also seek for permission from their parents.
Secondly, although without discipline, the school will be in a chaos and thus, denting the reputation of the school.In our views, we allow abusive any discipline method only if the parents allow. Thirdly, if we do not emphasising on discipline, it will also result in rowdy classrooms and disrupted lessons. Fourthly, we, as students, have to be discipline so that we would not be involve in any distruption of lessons. So that every lesson would be a knowledgeable one.
Lastly, the teachers in school are not the parents of the student, so they can't use any abusive discipline method on the student. If they want to discipline the student, they must call the student's parent to allow them to use this method.
To conclude, we disagree that the school to use abusive discipline methods to discipline the students in school, students should also be discipline. Thank you !
Done by : Register 31 and 36 (:
Dear 31 and 36
ReplyDeleteYou already have the content, more or less, but what you need to do is focus on presentation and organisation.
Currently, your essay is presented in the form of a big chunk of words, which makes it difficult to read. What you can do is leave a line every paragraph.
Another thing that you should consider changing is that each paragraph should begin a new point. Therefore, you should begin each paragraph with 'Firstly', 'Secondly' etc instead of lumping them in one paragraph.
Hope this helps.